Awkward Happenings Lately

The past few weeks have been filled with awkward occurrences. Which should come as no surprise, seeing as how my whole life has been filled with awkward occurrences. But the past few weeks have been particularly humorous, and I feel inclined to share.

1. Last night I was in the JFSB. It was past eight o'clock, and I was getting hungry enough to stop studying and go home. So I stepped into the elevator and hit "Basement." (I was on level 4.) When the elevator stopped, I stepped out rather briskly (I was really hungry) and almost ran into a man who was trying to step on rather briskly. I realized I was only on the second floor so awkwardly tried to retrace my steps backward onto the elevator as the man--who was a custodian cleaning the JFSB--said, "Sorry about that! That scared me. I'm not used to running into people this late at night!" I looked at the time--8:30--and thought, "Well, let's hope you don't pass out when you see me in my office in this building at 10 pm!"

2. I was in a computer lab on campus writing a paper when I got up rather rapidly because I remembered that I had left my very expensive textbook in my classroom several hours before. As I turned to walk out of the computer lab I tripped on a chair and totally biffed it. I quickly stood up, thinking that no one had seen (and tried to pretend I had just kicked the chair, not fallen on it) when one guy nearby turned around and said in a loud voice, "Are you ok? Did you just fall over?" So then everyone in the lab knew that I had fallen over. I laughed and tried to say something witty while running out of there. It was even more awkward when I had to walk back inside and past said overly helpful bystander to return to my computer.

3. This one's the real killer. A couple of weeks ago I drove to church (in the Law building) and parked in a different spot than usual. To be exact, it was the 30 minute weekday parking, with parking blocks in front of each parking stall (the regular stalls don't have said parking blocks). When I got into my car after church I turned the key and, you guessed it, forgetting the parking block was in front of my car, drove straight forward.

I was more than a little surprised to hear a large "thump" sound and everyone in the parking lot turned to look at me. Well, I could either keep going forward or try to go backward over the block, so I kept driving. And those who weren't looking at me after the first thump were definitely looking at me after the second. But I just drove away nonchalantly, pretending like this was a normal occurance (it's not, by the way).

The next morning as I was driving to work I heard a strange hissing sound all the way...

There were actually many, many more awkward things that happened to me, but they don't make the blog cut because they involve people who might actually read my blog. Which is unfortunate, because they are awesome stories.

Awkward Encounters

Today a man said good morning to me as he walked past me on campus. A bit startled because I didn't recognize him, I said hello back.

And then I wondered, should I feel flattered because he said hello to me even though he didn't know me?

Or should I feel awkward because he said hello because he did know me but I just didn't recognize him?

Ah, the quandaries of my life...

On Being Arrived to the Age of Twenty-Three

Today in my British lit class we read this poem. I just laughed. Imagine, being 23 and feeling like you are so old you will never be able to accomplish all you want to in life! (Not that these very thoughts have been running through my mind recently...)

I think Milton has much better stuff out there (he did, after all, write this when he was 23), but this is still enjoyable. Especially if you are 23.

HOW soon hath Time, the subtle thief of youth,
Stolen on his wing my three and twentieth year!
My hasting days fly on with full career,
But my late spring no bud or blossom shew’th.
Perhaps my semblance might deceive the truth,
That I to manhood am arrived so near,
And inward ripeness doth much less appear,
That some more timely-happy spirits indu’th.
Yet be it less or more, or soon or slow,
It shall be still in strictest measure even
To that same lot, however mean or high,
Toward which Time leads me, and the will of Heaven,
All is, if I have grace to use it so,
As ever in my great Task-master’s eye

(Stay tuned for a list of reasons why 23 IS old at BYU...)

And then he told me he used to teach in Kyrgyzstan...

Recently I have been having random experiences that involve really awesome people and the sense that God orchestrated this chance meeting. Do you ever have that feeling? Like, I would think this is coincidence except it is just too awesome to be coincidence!

Like a couple of weeks ago. One of my Arabic professors emailed me and asked if I wanted to go to an elementary school to volunteer there with an activity they were doing involving Arabic, Spanish, and Chinese. Even though it meant I would have to leave work early and leave one of my classes (not to mention the drive to Lehi...) I only thought about it for about 5 seconds before agreeing to go. I mean, how awesome would that be, right?

Although I actually ended up doing almost nothing (they had a real Arab there. What did they want me for?) I met two very cool people--one (the real Arab) was from Morocco. His name was Mohammad. He used to be Muslim. And now he is Mormon. In addition to the coolness of that alliteration, I felt that this was an important person for me to meet. I mean, how many Mohammads from Morocco do you know that have been baptized into the church? And 10 days after September 11, 2001...his story sounded pretty crazy and awesome.

And the other woman there? An American (also Mormon) whose husband was Arab, from Ramallah. And his family still lives there. When I mentioned my desire to write a book about Palestinian women in the West Bank, she said, "Well I know a lot of those..."

And I just thought, wow.

And then! Just when I thought things couldn't get any more crazy and ideal in my life, I stayed after one of my classes a minute to talk to my professor (the one who knew the guy from 1837...). Since he is a visiting professor from Chicago, I asked him if he knew anything about the center for Near and Middle Eastern studies there, since it is one of my options for grad school. Although he didn't know anyone who taught there personally, another student who was waiting to talk to the professor said, "That is where my husband just finished his PhD! In fact, we are flying out to defend his dissertation next week!" And then she invited me over for dinner to talk about grad school at Chicago.

Finally, another day I was talking to said professor about a paper that I am writing for his class. And he mentioned something about "when I was teaching in Kyrgyzstan..."

And I thought, "I used to think you were cool, but now I know you are cool!" Because I have been reading about Pakistan recently (in "Three Cups of Tea") and I have suddenly become a bit more interested in that area of the world. Because actually all the "stan" countries (Kyrgyzstan, Pakistan, Uzbekistan, Turkmenistan, Afghanistan, Kazakhstan, and Tajikistan) lie between the "Middle East proper" and China.

A sort of bridge between my two worlds.

Weird, huh. And then I thought, I want to go to Kyrgyzstan!

What a crazy life I have, eh?

"I knew his brother"

Today in my Critical Theory class the professor was speaking of a critic, von Humboldt, and mentioned that he had never taught this particular critic's theory in a class before. In fact, he said that he wasn't even very familiar with the critic himself, but was more familiar with the critic's older brother, who was a scientist.

"Although I wasn't familiar with von Humboldt's theories," he said, "I knew his brother."

I glanced down at the page and saw that von Humboldt had died in 1835. Now, my professor might think he is old, but not that old. I shrugged it off and figured that professors live so much in their minds that knowing someone in his mind must have meant the same thing to this professor as actually knowing him in person.

But then a girl raised her hand and asked, "I'm sorry, but how could you have known his brother if he died in 1835?" And the professor looked startled for a minute and then realized what he said.

And started laughing.

The rest of the class was laughing, too. Hysterically. In fact, he couldn't even speak for a couple of minutes because he and we were all laughing so hard. And then he tried to start talking about the critic again but couldn't keep the laughter inside.

"I've been doing this for too long," he said. "I have been teaching for way too long."

I just laughed because it did prove my point that professors do live inside their heads...

Seat Thief

You know the security that comes from always sitting in the same seat? When you walk into a biology class or an English class--or even church, for that matter--you don't have to pick again and again where you want to sit. Pick once, and the laws of applied physics will almost guarantee you don't have to pick again. Because everyone else wants to sit in the same seat, too.

Today, that security was stolen from me.

I walked into class and was shocked to see someone sitting in my seat. And he didn't even look sorry about it. Not that there aren't 15 empty seats in the class that he could have chosen without taking my seat. Not that I don't have two classes in that classroom this semester and I carefully categorize my class material by where I sit in the class (a different seat for each class). Not that he didn't know I sit there every day (although this one is debateable, I guess. Maybe some people don't pay attention to things like this).

Needless to say, the karma of my whole day was thrown off.

Children...(not mine)

Since I don't have children of my own, I just take pictures of other peoples' children. Good thing I have so many willing subjects, too, since on my mission my first nephew was born. And my second, and my third.

Crazy.

Anyway, I like to pretend that these fellows won't smile for any other camera but mine. I'm just gifted like that. :)